Serious Secrets

It’s been quite awhile since I last wrote - definitely a long time coming. They say you’re only as sick as your secrets. There’s truth in that. In my home/culture/heritage, mental illness will forever be a point of contention; it was and never will be recognized as a “real” or serious condition. If it’s not …

Atelophobia

Can't say that there was anything tragic or drastic that triggered these thoughts and reflections that I currently have. Maybe there's something about it being the end of the year and finally having a bit of quiet space away from work and school. At the same time it's been AWHILE since I've done any "real" …

Holy pizza…cookie…ice cream???

For the next two weeks, I'll be traveling around the northwester area of the United States - why? Just because. Seeing different areas of the country I live in.  Tonight, I'm in Chicago. The Windy City. Home of the Chicago pizza. So, when in Chicago, do what the Chicagoans (???) do? Eat the real life, …

Hide-and-Seek

We've all played hide-and-seek as a child. Some of us better and seeking than hiding; Some of us better at hiding than seeking. The latter is where my mastery lays. This concept of hiding has been on my mind for the last few weeks, enough to pull me out of my hiatus from writing. There …

Valentine’s Day

A day where is everything is about love. However, the love seems to be focused around others. Giving gifts to significant others, and finding that "perfect" Valentine to be loved by. It's also a day where Celine Dion's prominent song, "All by myself" can be heard blaring out of the windows of those who are …

Eat, Pray…

...Love? For the last 4.5 months, I've been involved in a relationship with a significant other (bf); The longest relationship I've been in with a real, caring human. I recently suggested we take a break. For the last 14 years, I've been involved in a relationship with a possessive, abusive shape shifter, "ED". I've broken …

Why??? Because…

Yes, it's 10:42PM and yes, I had an "almost midnight" ice cream snack. Why? Because I knocked out two hours ago and dreamt of ice cream. It had to happen. Why???!!! ...because recovery!!!

PRESENT.

Pumpkin Spice this, Peppermint Mocha that, Salted Caramel everything! Black Friday, Cyber Monday, SALE SALE SALE!!! During the thicke of the holiday season, it's easy to get lost in the hustle and bustle of all the winter comestibles and wrapped up in the literal presents, that we tend to push aside the physical present and the …

The Gifts of Encouragement

The ability to self-encourage in recovery is an incredibly difficult skill. We've spent countless hours in DBT groups, CBT groups, Body Acceptance groups, Shame groups, etc... practicing, in hopes of creating new neuropathways to equip ourselves for this long journey to full recovery. Although this is a necessary tool to have, it is probably one of the …

Chasing Recovery

Recovery plays hard to get! #rude! As much as we want recovery to look like the top half of this picture...it's so not! How unfair is that?! We run after it (only if you're on the appropriate exercise level for it 😋), fall into a hole, sprain our ankle, keep hobbling on crutches, then throw …